The Thick of It

Two weeks into Leg Session... Hill Day... two 14+ hour days... and I'm at my desk entering bills into the tracking system.

The last few days have had their surreal moments, and sure, parts were a blur, but I can honestly say I am having the time of my life. The adrenaline, the deadlines, the pressure. I'm exhausted, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Feels Like...

Here's a picture of the new place - but not the sidewalk in front, yeah it's a real neighborhood. Nice. Also note the shiny new Xterra out front. I tried to be a good democrat and take public transportation, I did. But last week as I stood waiting for the bus that never came in the freezing cold, I decided it was time for a change. I mean, sure I can still take the bus when I want, but at least we have a car that all of us fit in! I'll just have to exchange some carbon credits or something to remain a good democrat. And admittedly, I got it for Ian, and he's thrilled. That's just how I roll.

Emily is really settling into her new school - which is close enough to walk to, have I mentioned that already? Probably. It's just mind boggling after growing up in such a rural area. I'm excited to finally settled somewhere that I can see the kids growing up happily. Will and then Violet going to Emily's old school and the teachers remembering her! It feels like home.

I Hike Her

I feel like we've settled in to our new house, a new routine. Will looks forward to walking to meet Emily after school, Emily is making friends at her new school, Violet is crawling everywhere and playing with Emily and Will, Session has started, I'm slammed at work, everything is actually pretty great. And today Will said this:

"Hydat, I hike her"



Translation: "Violet, I like her".

And my heart just breaks for the millionth time over these kids of ours.

What?

I'm thinking that maybe if I write, it will help. That maybe in writing I'll somehow manage to find some clarity in this moment.

We've moved, and everything is here, in various stages of unpacked. In some ways we're doing remarkably well, and I feel more "moved in" than I ever did at our last house. In others, I throw my hands up in exasperation. While Will and Violet's worldly belongings can easily fit into a couple bins and some drawers, Emily's room is overflowing, and we need not forget that 2/3's of Will and Violets things are hand me downs from Emily. Which I remembered as I was playing in Will's room with a seven year old Little People. Little Person? Little Peoples? Well anyway, the thing is old. And I dimly recall playing with exactly that toy in Emily's room in Pullman... was that really that long ago?

Now that little toddler is seven years old, and I swear to you, suffering from some kind of early hearing loss. At the end of the day, I've talked enough for two days, repeating every sentence I utter over again and again. "Emily please get the vacuum cleaner, plug it in, and vacuum that mess" What? "Please get the vacuum cleaner" The bathroom cleaner? "THE VACUUM CLEANER!".

So yeah. It's fun.

I mean clearly she's stressed about starting a new school. Will bursts into tears if you hurt his feelings, and well, the way I've been acting actually happens more than I'd like it to. And Violet, she's mostly okay, it's just the cumulation of all three, all needing us, and wanting me specifically.

That's parenthood, right? Something about treasuring these moments before they slip through our fingers, and I realize that Little People toy the grandkids are playing with is 30 years old? Yes, I know. I do. And I promise, I've had more fun lately. Just enjoying the kids. I spent a wonderful morning with Emily at the Olympia Farmer's Market picking out her Christmas gift for my mom. And Will and I spent Sunday afternoon in the garage unpacking boxes, and he's truly turning into such a fun person to be around. Violet is on the move, and I love to watch her crawl after the other kids. Watching the energy between the three of them is one of my greatest joys.

And that's the kind of affirmation I need.